Déjà vu

Tonight was a bit of Déjà vu for many reasons. 

I went to the hospital tonight.  It was a year to the date when I went to the hospital for my nervous breakdown.  Luckily tonight, it wasn't for that reason.  Instead it was because I sprained my ankle badly while Irish Dancing at a pub.  No I was not drinking. Maybe if I had, I wouldn't have sprained it so badly.  Luckily, there was a medic, Chris, at the pub who helped me and there was another woman there, Beth, who let me hold her hand; they both stayed by my side until I was able to get transportation to the hospital.  I was very grateful for my new friend Yev, who I had just met the other night at an Irish Dancing gig.  He drove me to the hospital and stayed with me until I was ready to leave; and he then drove me home and helped me get to my place! 

Last time I sprained my ankle (same ankle unfortunately), I had just moved to Colorado.  Here I was now and I just moved to San Francisco.  What took me less than a week to sprain in Colorado, took me a month to sprain in San Francisco.  So I’m now aware of the care that is needed to help this foot heal and I will not push it.  Unfortunately, it’s going to be bit of a long road.  I have to rest for 3 days and I’m to use the crutches for 2 weeks.  (And I’m supposed to work this week, which requires a lot of walking).  Then it will take anywhere from 2-6 months to heal. So, there will be no dancing, no bike riding, and no going to the gym for me for a long time. I have to be even more careful in the future because it’s more likely to sprain more, especially since it has already been sprained twice.

It was an interesting day today as I was reflecting back on my past year,,,even prior to all of this happening.  Although I do have to say it was an awful year and I was at my darkest, I also have to say that I am grateful for this year…including what happened tonight.  It’s been a tremendous learning curve for me and for that I am grateful.  I feel stronger, but most importantly I feel happy...I am happy.

I’m happy for many reasons, but the number one reason is because I’m learning about myself and the beauty I possess.  I’m learning more about my purpose and I’m surrounding myself with very positive people in my life.  I feel as though I’m moving forward rather than falling behind.  I'm cutting out the crap and keeping quality.  

  I enjoy being here in San Francisco and I especially love being alone.  Although I’m an extrovert, I do appreciate being an introvert at the same time.  I like having my own space.   Although you would think I’d be terrible lonely not knowing anyone in the city, I do have to say, I actually feel wonderful.  Sure loneliness will creep in, but it’s very rare and it’s not too long before I give myself a pep talk and I’m out of that mindset.  I like it because there are no expectations here for me to be someone I’m not. I can just be myself and I’m learning to be okay with all of that.  I like it here because there is opportunity for me here.  There is opportunity for me to be whoever I want to be and do whatever I want to...of course within reason.  I like it here because I feel free.  I like it here because the weather is so tolerable.  Overall, I like it here because it provides me a different outlook on life.  

Thank you for reading! Have a wonderful day!